Most Hearthstone players will agree that there is nothing worse than losing to a stupid deck. With that in mind, let’s jump into my Pirate Warrior guide.
Let people bad-mouth Pirate Warrior all they want. Some things they might say are, “This deck takes no skill to play,” or “Fuck you dude, you farm wins off control players.” They’re just mad that you beat them with a deck that isn’t even listed in Tempostorm’s tier list. Pirate Warrior is a gimmick, but it is a gimmick that works. In the right hands, this deck will take games off of the highest ranked legend players, and make them throw their keyboard at their cat too. RIP rank one legend.
Pirate Warrior is explosively powerful. Cards like Upgrade and Bloodsail Cultist allow you to snowball weapons while pushing face damage with minions. The achilles’ heel of the deck is two-fold: it suffers from a myriad of inconsistencies and runs out of steam very quickly, as it runs no card draw. I am here to stand by pirate warrior – it IS viable! I’ve been making a mockery of legend for a while with it and I’ve used it almost exclusively in my climb this month. If you know what you are doing, this deck will absolutely beat on people.
Here are a few tricks and tips that will have every player from rank 5 to legend walking the plank. BRB drinking bleach.
PIRATE TIP 1: You don’t actually need to go face all the time. It is VERY FREQUENTLY beneficial to use weapons to clear minions and allow for your own dudes to push recurring damage. Recognizing these situations comes from experience.
PIRATE TIP 2: Don’t be an idiot with weapon damage. If you equip your war axe on turn two, swing at face, then upgrade it on turn 3, you are missing 6 potential damage. This shit isn’t rocket science. Sometimes, it is okay to do this if you fear the hard dick of Harrison Jones.
PIRATE TIP 3: Play your outs! I talked about this briefly in my legend advice, but it is much more centrally important here as you WILL end up topdecking almost every game. Recognize what you have to do to generate the highest chance at lethal. Use a pen and paper to crunch the numbers if you have to.
“But math sucks.”
So does not being legend, douchebag.
PIRATE TIP 4: Your pirates are oftentimes more useful because of their tribe than their vanilla stats. If you think your Southsea Deckhand is just going to be pinged turn two, hold on to it and use it to buff your weapon in conjunction with Bloodsail Cultist.
PIRATE TIP 5: YOU DON’T ACTUALLY NEED TO GO FACE EVERY TIME! But sometimes you do… When Rag comes down and starts fucking your shit up, there is no way you are going to clear that guy. Know when to turn all your attention to melting face.
PIRATE TIP 6: Count! That! Damage! You have way more than 30 damage available in your deck… I’m way too lazy to count it but take my word for it. Despite the tone of this article (and my general disrespect for the game), I’m serious here. Consider how much potential damage output your minions and spells have. This deck thrives on milking as much damage as possible from high tempo cards.
PIRATE TIP 7: Tilting is great… when other people do it. Make sure to spam emotes as you fearlessly throw that Arcanite Reaper at Malfurion’s smug fucking face. This is a fun deck that also happens to be somewhat competitive.
If you follow these tricks, you too can be a legendary pirate warrior like me! Let the hate mail commence.
-InVade Xfyre, tag Blawps2 #1400, is a member of Invade Clan Hearthstone and Overwatch. He is a legend player with a specialized knowledge of control warrior builds. He is also one half of the gruesome twosome “Double Deeks,” made infamous by CoD search and destroy strategies that revolved around camping with shotguns.